Darn you rain!

It just figures. Mom and dad left this morning for Vancouver (and their Alaska cruise), and the weather turns crappy. It did this when they were in Florida a couple weeks ago too! The reason this is such a pain in the rear end is that the only time I can really relax is when I have the house to myself and there's very little chance I'll be interrupted by someone coming home. It's really the only time I allow to lay out on the back deck and sunbathe (I know it's bad for me. I'm already high-risk for skin cancer. It's one of my vices) in my bikini. I'm not so conscious that I won't wear my bathing suit around my family (though every once in a while my dad or uncle will make some inappropriate comment and I'll spend the rest of the day in my room in sweats), but since I'll be wearing a strapless bridesmaids dress later this year, I'm being much more careful about funny tan lines. This means I'm wearing tube tops and my bandeau-bikini top when I sunbathe, which is a bit more, um, daring than my other bikini tops. Hence the reason I prefer to tan when nobody else is home. I've been coming home from campus a couple hours early on nice days to get a little bit of sun-worshiping in before dad gets home from work, but I always feel like I need to go get re-dressed as soon as he gets home.

My seasonal depression didn't get as bad this winter as it usually does, but I think I have to give the credit for that to being able to go outside and play in the snow and picking up running (on the treadmill). None the less, I feel like I need to spend as much time as possible outside now to get myself back into equilibrium. No matter how stressed I am about something, spending some time in the sun and a little physical exertion bring me back to center.

I don't even have the house to myself right now. Sean, my 19 year-old brother, is home. He isn't taking summer classes and hasn't heard back about any jobs, so he's been spending more and more time here at the house instead of at his apartment in town ... and he's driving me nuts. He's even more nosey and loud than dad. I can't be in my bedroom for 10 minutes before he's clomping up the stairs and down the hallway (he doesn't know how to WALK, he STOMPS like a flippin' elephant) just to stop in my doorway and stare or make some stupid comment that I ignore. He's generally a good kid, but he's never learned when to just shut up and walk away or how to control his temper. It leads to some spectacular fights in our house. If he's here when I get home from campus and my run tomorrow, I'm going to tell him to go back to his apartment. I can't deal with his distraction right now. If I can't enjoy the sun, I clean and organize to deal with my stress. I can't do that with him stomping in and out of the house and leaving his crap laying everywhere.

It's bad when I start to think of my basement lab on campus as my haven. I decided to take today and friday off from running since the race is Saturday, but a run is sounding really good right now, even with the cool rain.